Making Existence More Bearable, Mentally

Why do optimists have a better outlook on life?

Their world usually appears brighter, more filled with possibility, and challenges seem merely temporary from their perspective.

Also, research suggests they live longer and generally report higher life satisfaction.

Yet pessimists tend to be closer to reality than optimists, but the benefits of that is skewed towards those who can withstand prolonged disappointment without losing motivation.

I'm not sure if it's a good thing or not when you can maintain a good level of accuracy about life's challenges and still find the motivation to face them.

The accuracy of negative predictions offers little emotional reward when realized, correctly anticipating what goes wrong rarely brings satisfaction in the aftermath. Even when we did our best to reduce its effect.

For example, when we correctly predict a project failure, the validation of our foresight rarely compensates for the disappointment we experience when it eventually happens.

"Realist" On Paper

I think being a realist for the most part is acknowledging that both viewpoints offer partial truths while neither captures the full complexity of existence.

Some of us claim to be "realists" but unconsciously lean toward whichever bias—optimistic or pessimistic—best protects our emotional well-being. This is normal.

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They say you can't be wise and be in love at the same time. In this context, you can't expect an optimist (or even a pessimist for that matter) to maintain complete objectivity while still retaining their emotional relationship with possibility or caution.

For me, this is where it gets muddy, in that each perspective requires selective attention, emphasizing certain aspects of reality while downplaying others. It's the only way our minds can efficiently process the overwhelming complexity of existence without decision paralysis.

As much as life is what we make of it, there's also a stark reality that never ceases to assert itself regardless of our interpretive frameworks. I appreciate the fact that I don't need to be perfectly consistent in my motivation/inspiration to get the needed work done.

We are somehow bound by objective limitations, and ignoring real constraints is a recipe for wasting energy on impossibilities that diminish our capacity to respond effectively to what's actually within our control.

Meta-Understanding

The subtle difference between being delusional versus being illusional is in the awareness. The illusioned person consciously chooses a perspective they know may not reflect the full picture but serves their psychological needs. The delusioned have lost this awareness, mistaking their perceptual filter for reality itself.

Unlike perspective which can be shifted at will, awareness is the meta-cognitive understanding that allows one to see the whole board and spectrum of possible interpretations without becoming attached to any single one as absolute truth.

Making omelettes without breaking an egg is the impossible demand we place on optimism—to deliver its psychological benefits without any risk of disappointment.

I prefer to have the motivation, joy and possibility that optimism provides without the occasional crash of unmet expectations. Who am I kidding??

Oversimplification as a byproduct of acute uncertainty explains why we gravitate toward either optimism or pessimism when facing complex situations.

During moments of greatest ambiguity, nuanced "realism" becomes psychologically untenable.

Partly because we need a way to maintain forward momentum when complete information is unavailable. Otherwise, the paralysis of analysis would prevent us from taking necessary action in the face of incomplete information.

Sometimes the space(s) between our perspectives and reality are necessary fictions that make existence more bearable.

The friction between how we see the world and how it actually unfolds isn't a problem to solve. I think it's not solvable to a large extent.

But re-visiting some of these mechanisms on how we construct meaning from uncertainty can be a good way to uncover insights that were previously overlooked.


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