The healing we need

Emotional trauma wears no face. It doesn't care if you're a man or a woman — it pulls at the same threads of your soul, slowly unraveling you. But if you’re a woman, sometimes the world expects you to bleed quietly, to be strong, to "move on" before you’re ready. And that expectation alone becomes another wound.

I’ve seen it firsthand. New mothers, fresh from the battle of childbirth, whispering about postpartum depression like it’s a shameful secret. And those of us who haven’t heard the drums of the labour room might think, they’re exaggerating. But they’re not. That’s the scar talking. The one no one sees but still aches in the middle of the night.

And then, there are the men — often silent, often dismissed. I remember my mother after my father died. A once radiant woman crumbled into someone barely recognizable. Her mourning was loud in some moments and painfully quiet in others. And I, just a child, watched her break and try to build herself back, piece by piece.

Healing is not one-size-fits-all. Every human — man, woman, or in between — deserves the space to cry, to scream, to be held, and to be seen. Because healing is not just about time passing. It's about being surrounded by kindness. Especially the kind that comes from a good partner — the kind that doesn’t add pressure to your pain but helps you carry it.

So yes, heal. Cry if you must. Rest if you need. But whatever you do, choose love that understands you. That kind of love doesn’t rush your recovery. It becomes part of it.

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