Good Friday for the displaced.

I have been down with a hellish fever for the past few days. I think it is the weather wearing me down. I can't be sure about my illness without a proper check-up but I don't really have the energy to book a doctor's appointment either. I spoke to the Red Cross volunteers about it. For one, I know what medicines I need to get but things are a little different here when it comes to the chemist. You see, in Ukraine, I could write myself a prescription if needed, but most of everything can be bought over the counter. Here, it is not like that. On one hand, I am not in favor of jamming up the medical helpline coz I've heard some refugees are still waiting for their turn since there are many who need medical attention. And the fact that it probably is something not very serious I'm ill with pushes me more just to brute through it.

I am feeling a little better today, and hence I can share a little bit about my life as a refugee. "Refugee", that word makes me mad. Never in my life did I ever imagine that everything would end so abruptly. Now I'm stressing myself even more with worries about the present and the future, constantly thinking about how I've lost so much, and how I may never be able to climb back to where I was. And all of it is obviously taking a toll on my physical health.

ON A LIGHTER NOTE

Wishing a happy good Friday to everyone celebrating. It is a difficult time for many, but little celebrations are being lined up to make it feel a little like home. Today, during lunch, huge baskets of chocolates and candies came through. Bags of chocolates shaped like little eggs for everyone to pass around. There was milk chocolate, dark chocolate, and chocolate with hazelnuts.

I saw them by the door in the morning but didn't really think much of them. One of the volunteers brought the baskets to the dining hall during lunch hours. It was really sweet and you should have seen the smiles on the kids' faces. They were all so happy! A bunch of us have decided to take the extra bags out on Sunday and distribute them among the local kids. We are also chipping in some money to buy some candy from our pockets, too.

We got news about various events happening in Amsterdam and nearby areas on the occasion of Easter. There is also a concert planned for the locals and the Ukrainians have free entry. A tiny part of the refugees living with me wants to go. I say a tiny because not everyone is in the mood for anything colorful. It is the same with others, too. I was talking to Elena who is in Poland now. She also isn't in the mood to celebrate anything. I asked what her plan was and she replied "It doesn't feel like Easter".

Most of the people staying with me are from Kharkiv. We all share similar stories. Kharkiv is among the many cities that have been brutally attacked. Sometimes we sit together during lunch and talk about things, it usually ends in tears. Yesterday we all pitched in and sent some money to Alyona, grandma of a fellow refugee. She is still stuck in a small village outside Kharkiv. My bank is still bugging from time to time so I could manage to send only around 65 USD and had to do it in 3 transactions. We try to stick together and help each other out whenever possible.

The weather here has turned really beautiful. Unfortunately due to my condition, I am not able to go out. I hope once I get better I can show you more about how we are living here and how friendly the people have been to us.